The Truly Reigh Space

Entry

today I decided to start my own website. it's 3 am and i have a trip to leave in two hours, but i'm here anxious as hell and excited, not to sound too corny about starting this endeavour. when starting this process and learning how to code? i guess what is happening. it all feels insane. i was asked to list my hobbies, and interests, as well as when i first joined the site to entail what my site would include. i have always stuggled with those kinds of questions. the what are your hobbies, tell me your passions, get to know me better type of questions. i guess i've never really known myself. i've stuggled with mental illness for over half of my life, so when it seemed everyone else was finding who they were and what they like, i was just fighting to survive. and maybe that's wrong of me to say cause maybe i was just selfish or lazy or didn't care enough to figure it out but now, i stand at 24 years old with not a clue of who i am or who i wanna be. and i know that is not an uncommon feeling. i was having a conversation with my aunt about this and she told how she sometimes feels lost too, so whether you're in your twenties or your fifties feeling out of place, confused, and unsure is valid and normal. we stuggle to find our place in the world, growing up, our education system does not prepare us for any sort of life outside of those 7 hours of hallways. we go out blind, unsure of how any of this new independent, free, but very lonely world works. what my final point i'm trying to make is the reason i made this website, is to help dsiscover who i am, through writing and trying new things and hopefully challening myself to change. i want to emerge with a sense of purpose, and maybe that's asking a lot of a website, or even a life, but i just want here to be a safe place. a space where you can escape into the depths of my brain and see my insanity, which i hope will make you feel more valid in yours. while i discover who i am, and lay my thoughts down to rest, i invite you to join me, stay a while, find me at my most authentic and vulnerable self, anonymous on the internet, and be truly reigh with me.